One of the three theoretical frameworks that structure the Live and Grieve™ program arc
The Dual Process Model of grief.
Grief does not move in stages. It oscillates. Stroebe & Schut, 1999.
What the Dual Process Model says.
Developed by Margaret Stroebe and Henk Schut in 1999, the Dual Process Model (DPM) proposes that grief does not move in a linear sequence of stages. Instead, bereaved people naturally oscillate between two orientations — and that oscillation is not a sign of dysfunction. It is grief working correctly.
Loss-oriented coping involves focusing on the loss itself — crying, thinking about the person who died, processing the pain of what happened. This is what most people picture when they think about grief.
Restoration-oriented coping involves focusing on the secondary consequences of loss — taking on new roles, navigating life changes, finding distraction, attending to the daily demands of living. This is not avoidance. It is necessary.
The DPM holds that oscillation between these two orientations is adaptive. People naturally move back and forth — sometimes in the same day. There is no right amount of time to spend in either. There is no correct sequence.
Why the DPM changes how we support grief.
It ends the pressure to 'move on'
If grief is oscillating — not progressing — there is no destination called 'over it.' The DPM gives people permission to carry grief and live at the same time. That is not failure. That is how it works.
It explains why grief comes in waves
People often feel confused or frightened when grief returns after a period of relative calm. The DPM explains this as normal oscillation — not regression. Understanding that reframes the experience entirely.
It validates restoration-oriented coping
Taking a break from grief — laughing, working, planning — is not disloyal to the person who died. The DPM names it as healthy and necessary. That distinction matters enormously to grieving people who feel guilty for having good days.
It applies to every kind of loss
The DPM was developed for bereavement but applies to all significant loss — relationships, health, roles, community. The oscillating pattern appears across loss types, which is why Live and Grieve™ uses it as a foundational framework.
One of six frameworks. Two layers.
Live and Grieve™ is grounded in six peer-reviewed frameworks. Three theoretical frameworks structure the program arc. Three applied practice frameworks shape every session.
Layer 1 — Theoretical
- ◆Dual Process Model — Stroebe & Schut
- ◆Tasks of Mourning — Worden
- ◆Continuing Bonds Theory — Klass, Silverman & Nickman
Layer 2 — Applied Practice
- ◆Meaning Reconstruction — Neimeyer
- ◆Self-Compassion — Neff
- ◆Companioning the Bereaved — Wolfelt
Experience It
The program built on this research.
“The 7 Things Nobody Tells You About Grief” — free from Wayne and Jamie Simms. Includes the Dual Process Model and all six frameworks in plain language. No group near you? Start at solo.tripillarstudio.com — $24.99 or three payments of $9.99.